File 6 - Poop Dance Party and a Pizza

Mom of boys....  What a title...  What does that even mean?

I grew up with girls - three sisters.  My husband has two sisters.  Then one niece arrived, then another, then another.  I mean, I was surrounded by girls.  When I got pregnant with my first, I was like "This is going to be a girl."  But, here's the funny thing.  I never really related to girls - the makeup, the hair- legitimately, I have worn my hair in the same bun, for over 30 years.  When I have to go to a public event, like a wedding or a work event, I have a glam squad.  My Mom dresses me and my niece or best friend do my hair and makeup.  Like, honestly, no effing idea.

At about 8 weeks pregnant, with my first, I started to bleed pretty severely.  It was terrifying.  I went to the hospital, with my Mom, and they ran all the tests.  I remember telling my Mom, that as crazy as it sounded, I kept saying in my head, "Hang in there, little guy."  It was the strangest thing, but I knew, at that moment, it was a boy.  Okay, I am not psychic....or am I.....mwuahahaha.  No, LMFAO.  I don't even believe in that!   But, for some reason, my brain said boy.  And, sure enough, three healthy ultrasounds and several months later, we learned we were having a boy.  And, then, I just knew, it was only boys, in my future.  If you want to come for a psychic reading, just call me.  My record is about 8% right on the gender of babies.  I just happen to hit the 50% odds, with my own.

Hence, I live in a house with boys. And I wouldn't want it any other way.  The main source of laughs?  Potty humor. It sounds so cliche but it is #truth.  Like this -

It is Monday morning.  Monday, the biggest douche of the week.  We are ALWAYS behind.  We could get up at 4 am and we would still leave the house 10 minutes late.

So, we are running late and I am finishing up getting ready, when my oldest appears.  He asks if I am almost done.  This is new....  I am sure his father has sent him up here as an adorable reminder  of our tardy status.  When I tell him that I will be down in a few, he says good, because he and his brother want me to hear the Poop Song.  The Poop Song?  I politely suggest to my sweet boy that they go ahead and listen to this....Poop Song....without me.  And, with that, he disappears.  Mere moments later, I follow him.

Before I hit the middle landing, on the stairs, I hear it:

"Poop.  Poop poop poop poop.   Poop poop pooppapoop."

These incredible lyrics are paired with a lovely guitar melody and are being blared over our Bluetooth speaker.  It is Monday morning.  We are really late.  Are my boys getting their stuff on and getting ready to go?  Nope.  They are busting their moves, to the Poop Song, living their best lives, lol.  And this Poop Song?  Apparently, not a one hit wonder. This group has like 200+ YouTube videos!?!?!  There is also a Pee Song.  Am I in the wrong profession???  I digress....

So, I did what every Mom of boys, who is running extremely late on a Monday morning, would do. I joined this impromptu dance party, ensuring to add some interpretive moves to those profound lyrics.   
On a completely unrelated note, well not totally because I am starving , can we talk about pizza?  I f**cking love pizza.  My husband makes a bomb homemade crust, so we have pizza, once a week.  We usually make a smoked salmon pizza or sausage and jalapeno pizza, for us, and just cheese for our oldest and just sauce??? for our youngest.  Have you ever heard of anyone having just sauce?  This kid is a trailblazer!  Recently, we tried a new type - kale and pesto pizza.  It was sooo good!!!!  I put a pic of this beaut below.

Nothing makes this mom of boys happier than a poop dance party and a pizza.

Does Mommy need to lose her shit?

Not this week.