File 20 - Swim Spa of Kiddie Pools

"It is time, yet?"  I look at my husband with desperation, on Sunday.
"For what?" he asks.
I make a subtle nod towards the littles, arguing and whining, sitting at the kitchen table.  Even that feels like a chore, as every muscle in my body, feels exhausted.  I wait for him to comprehend my non-verbal cue.  He just stares blankly back at me.  Sigh.
"Bed time" I mutter. A knowing smirk crosses his face and I watch his eyes shift to the clock.  The smirk fades into stone cold realization.  I follow his gaze.  4:30.  F**k.

It wasn't that it was a bad weekend.  It was a beautiful weekend!  It was the first weekend that felt like summer.  And we weren't going to waste one damn minute of it.  Saturday morning we met our family, at a local waterfront park, for a picnic brunch.  Everyone brought nibbles, which is always my favorite part.  Obviously.  We had fruit, veggies, cheeses, meats, coffee and, even, cupcakes.  Once we had found a place, that had the least amount of goose and duck crap, we spread out a blanket and chairs.  And these birds don't mess around.  Actually, I guess they do. Literally.  And that is why there is poop EVERYWHERE.  My MIL was actually scooping fowl feces, with a plastic spoon, from the surrounding area.  We don't take any shit, when it comes to picnicking.

We had the perfect location, too.  We were right across from the park.  Not like across the soccer field, from the park, but, like I could actually clearly see both my littles, playing at the park.  Just how I like it.  Anxiety was not welcome, at this shindig. We sipped coffee and ate nice cheese, while the kids got to run, climb, yell and burn off some of that super human energy they possess.  I mean who isn't happy AF, sitting outside and eating nice cheese?

Sunday was gardening and hang by the pool day.  Now, let's be clear, our pool is plastic and it is blown up with a foot pump, but it is legit.  It is the biggest blow up pool, I have ever seen, without a filter.  It is the swim spa of kiddie pools.  My boys can both float, fully stretched out, side by side, in this thing.  I am sure Mama could fit about four friends, in there, comfortably, with a glass of wine.  Just sayin.  So, we busted this bad boy out, for the first time this season.  I figured this would be a distraction, while I gardened.  We have a tiny little yard, so, once you add the colossal pool, there is very little room for plants.  There really is no competition between something that I can eat or something that looks pretty.  So, I was planting veggies and herbs.  Sun beaming down, hands in the dirt, smell of basil, in the air.  Splendid afternoon...

"Yes, baby."
"Can you come and get this out of the pool?"
"What is it?"
"A piece of grass."

Is this kid for real?  The kid who picks up ants, with his bare hands?  This was after - Can you find Blaze?  I don't know where he is, but you can just search the whole house.  I am thirsty.  I am hungry.  I am slowly going crazy, 5,4,3.....  I can't tell you, how many times I have paused and look around, waiting for a TV crew to come out.  But instead of it being Ashton Kutcher, it would be a nine year old, who has a very successful YouTube channel, that I have never heard of, but every kid dreams to be one day.  When they are nine.  Sigh.

As you can imagine, planting eight veggie plants, took a lot longer, than it should have.  Flash forward to the kitchen table, where two sun-soaked and exhausted boys, are arguing and whining over which castle Magikoopa?  Majihoomba?, whoever in the f**k, one of those clever and evil Super Mario creatures, lives in.  And two sun-soaked and exhausted parents are contemplating getting everyone in bed, at 4:30.   Summer weekends are the best.  So are early bedtimes.  And cheese.

Does Mommy need to lose her shit?

Not this week.